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Blueprints

by Bella Porter

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Los Angeles Loves You
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Michael Knauer
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Mark "Moose" Mendoza
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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    CREDITS:
    Written and performed by Bella Porter
    All tracks (except for Turning 24) produced by Bennett Littlejohn
    Turning 24 produced by Levi Nattrass
    Mixing by Bennett Littlejohn
    Mastering by Edsel Holden
    Design & Layout by Bella Porter

    MUSIC VIDEOS:
    https://www.youtube.com/bellarporter

    ABOUT THE ALBUM:
    Music making, for me, has always been a means of archiving my family’s and my own personal history. It’s the thing I do when I encounter some feeling or some person or some place I want to remember.
    The title for my second album ‘Blueprints’ holds many meanings for me. With it I like to think I'm paying homage to my late grandpa Jim (1942-2014), a talented architect, and to my dad and mom and mom’s dad, whose blueprints and miniature models brought so much wonder to me as a child. It also makes me think of my grandma “Emma” Faith, a renaissance woman whose lifelong career as a sculpture artist and love for the color blue have been woven into me and my need to make things in order to remember things and my own relationship to the pure magic that is the color blue.
    The process of making this album began after the loss of my beloved grandma Arleen "Mimi" Bachner (1938-2020) just a month before Covid-19 shut down the world. I found myself on the opposite side of the country from my family with a fresh wound and her favorite songs on repeat — Billie Holiday, Norah Jones, Edith Piaf. For the first 6 months of the pandemic I barely played music. For the first time, singing felt foreign and uncomfortable. It made me want to cry. As time went by without her, it got harder and harder to remember all the small details. It felt necessary to write everything down. And so I wrote “Mimi’s Lullaby” as a time capsule for our 23 years on earth together.
    The album as a whole is about childhood’s end and the bittersweet realization that there's a first and last time for everything. Your first time wearing makeup, the first time you peed yourself, your first time banging up your knees tripping on concrete. The last day in your childhood home, the last time your parents carried you to bed, the last hug from a grandparent. It’s about wanting to be 6 years old again — before the world could tell me who I was, when life was a sandbox, when everything was pure potential.


    ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS:
    This project would not have come together without the help and immense talent of Bennet Littlejohn who invited me into his and his partner Emmeline’s home without ever meeting me. Thank you for making the long and tedious process of recording and producing a breeze and a real slumber party! This project all began when I visited my sweet pal Levi Nattrass for a long weekend in Seattle in May of 2022. One of Levi’s many talents is bringing people together. I’ve met some of my favorite humans through him, several of whom can be heard on “Turning 24” including Sam Peterson, Steve Ibanez, and Sam Rossen. Thank you to Maayan Eldar, the love of my life, who supports even my most wildest endeavors, who has held me through the loss of loved ones, for coming to every one of my shows and waiting around for hours as I schmooze, and being the best honorary producer on every music video shoot. Thank you to my Mom and Dad for giving me life and a beautiful childhood for which I will forever write about and be nostalgic for. This album is dedicated to my lovely grandma Arleen "Mimi" Bachner (1938 - 2020) who showered me with endless love and comfort in our 23 years together. Thank you to my grandpa Sam "Papa" Bachner for taking me on wild adventures on land and through his storytelling and for being my best friend and partner in crime. Thank you to my grandma Faith "Emma" Porter for sewing whimsy and wonder into my earliest memories and for her endless inspiration as an artist and loving role model. This album is also dedicated to my brilliant grandpa Jim "Papa" Porter (1942 - 2014) — a talented trumpet player and architect that was taken from us too soon and whose legacy has left an indelible mark on me as a human and artist. Thank you to my siblings Oliver, Livy, and Zander for allowing me to embarrass you in song, for being my accomplices in these stories, and for filling my childhood with endless laughter and songwriting material. My little cousins Grayson and Cameron for being two of the best actors in the biz and starring in not one but TWO of my music videos. Thank you Claire Donohue and Sara Phenix (Rainbow Tunnel Films), Seannie Bryan, and Tylre Wilcox for helping me build out visual worlds for these songs and being such inspirations and joys to work with. Thank you to Baby Poo Poo, Cameron, Grayson, Eliza, Hugo, Chapin, Boden, Anson, Leo, Miles, Conrad, Landon, and Dante for coming to my fake birthday pool party and starring in the “Turning 24” music video. And to Cami & Peter for stepping in as life guards and making sure no one got hurt! Thank you to my cousins Jake, Jessica, Sophie, Luke, and Nicky for filling my life with so much joy and unconditional support and love. And thank you to my sweet pals, first ever bandmates, and musical soulmates Mal, Madi, Jeff, and Matt for shaping me into the musician and person I am today.     ... more
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  • Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    Includes unlimited streaming of Blueprints via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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1.
Failure to Launch 03:40
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After a while I’m sick of dependence I'm sick of being somebody’s problem Why does it feel so scary To be angry, to want things? Is it the fear of rejection? Fear of abandonment? Falling from grace with it? I’m reaching into myself Bringing into the light Parts that I’ve repressed I'm trying to feel myself For the first time I’m not feeling depressed I've been trained in the art of coyness Equating confidence with cockiness Holding my hand to my heart and saying I don’t deserve attention Growing up everyone felt so inclined To dress me up and tell me what a woman does I sang pretty songs and won competitions But noow I’m reaching into myself Bringing into the light Parts that I’ve repressed I'm trying to feel myself For the first time I’m not feeling depressed
2.
Alternative, folk, folk rock, indie rock, - Turning 24 03:16
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Britney spears in the bathtub Mom encouraged wearing makeup Titanic poses on the porch The neighbor’s dog poop in the front yard Paper chain links and Janet Jackson Playing surfer standing in the backseat Birthday parties in the yard I’m turning 24 next week I still don't know what I want In presents or in general Heaven was 6 years old And sunlight under parachutes Making forts in the living room I wanna have a birthday party With a trampoline and hot dog contest I want my parents to celebrate me Bake me a cake and push my face into it Im 24 (she’s 24) Going on 6 years old Biking ‘round the cul de sac Matzo ball soup to cure a cold fast Cannonballing into the deep end Playing Marco Polo every weekend Summer camps and extracurriculars Having scabs all over our exteriors I’ve got all these scars and memories It’s bitter but most sweet There’s a first and last time for everything I wanna fall asleep in the backseat Of my mom and dad’s SUV After a long night of socializing Have my dad sweep me off my feet And carry me to bed Like I’m a baby again
3.
Mimi's Lullaby 03:37
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Windows down Sunglasses on One hand’s on the wheel And one hand off Smell of perfume Mixed with butterscotch The leather is hot The radio is on Sunburns, her long nails My head in her lap Combing my hair as I cry Singing until I shut my eyes Summer nights Wrapped up in a towel Dripping all over the house To go take a shower Every concert Every graduation In the bleachers Every sports occasion Chocolates and game shows And noisy bracelets Mexico New Years And nine grandchildren Tried every wig Picked every flower And sang every song Knowing those would be Her last hours
4.
Arrested Development 04:09
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Dressing us in matching shirts Grandma sneaks us off to church Wrap our arms around each other I am barely six years old Grandma cries out of control Hands me something I'm too small to hold I am a locked drawer I am a locked drawer I am a locked drawer I am a locked drawer When you grow up Grow up to fast Bury your past Too close to the surface Some people don’t grow up They just get older Their babies keep digging Their sands for treasure My sister’s claimed all the Valuable furniture And my brothers have both got All of her artwork And I am a locked drawer Full of her secrets Someday she will go And I’ll have to keep ‘em
5.
Mallory 03:53
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Playing songs in my parents’ house When I dropped out of college She stuck around And when I couldn’t get out of bed When I’d obsess over every word I said Mallory Believed in me Driving around with no place to be I'm always safe when she’s with me All you need is one friend All you need is one friend All you need is one friend One friend One friend One fried Like Mallory Mallory Mallory Playing shows in the strangest towns Me, her, and Madi think we’re rockstars now We share the same taste in music As our dads did like we’re 80s kids Now that they’re older now We’re older now We dream about having detached garages Saving up money and building houses All you need is one friend All you need is one friend All you need is one friend One friend One friend One fried Like Mallory Mallory Mallory
6.
Let the Light In 02:27
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Before drifting off to sleep We played her home movies With her family all at her feet And her two best friends telling stories Hanging on her every murmur Begging for life from a lifeless figure When suddenly her hand would squeeze mine They’d say “Come on Bell, Sing it one more time” “My Funny Valentine,” Come on Mimi, give us a sign Finally she fell asleep I felt her warmth leave Then we opened up the curtains We opened them to let the light in Then we opened every window We opened them up to let her go
7.
Oliver 03:41
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Hazel eyes and your gap-toothed smile Crying out at me in your infancy Oh hazel eyes, you pissed in our sister’s mouth And ate your own shit on the balcony in Cancun What a tasty surprise Oh Oliver Let it go Oh Oliver Oh Oliver You were the first to piss me off, make me mad, You were the first person I cursed I just wanted the front seat But you wouldn’t give me it So I slapped you across the face and Kicked you in the ball sack And I flipped you off Oh Oliver Let it go Oh Oliver Oh Oliver I know how it feels To be left out I was the youngest ‘Til you came around And what goes around Is sure to come around And now you're a man Taking your anger out On your newly installed closet door Feeling insecure Oh Oliver let it go Oh Oliver I hope it shows I love you more than you’ll ever know
8.
Olivia 03:02
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I don't know what to do with myself When I don't feel good So I call up my sister And tell her I've missed her Oh Olivia Scraping our knees on the sewer concrete Wearing our mother’s heals Never acting our age Playing games Til someone got hurt Olivia Olivia Olivia Snooping through your drawers while you're out Trying to get close to you Piecing you together By trying on your sweaters And playing house You could turn my day around With just one loving embrace Hold me in your arms And I know everything will be okay Olivia Olivia Olivia
9.
Rough Terrain 03:27
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To sustain its flame And like the flowers depend Vitally on the falling rain I’m learning how to treat My body like a conduit My blemishes are more than Futile disadvantages And when you touch me I'm aware of all the obstacles But my acne scars and stretch marks Are strictly topographical I'm a rough terrain but I’m Smooth around the edges Tumbled by a thousand waves Out in the trenches Like a perfect waves needs The seabed to determine it’s shape I’m hardly flat I’d make the Greatest fucking shore break Ride it fast until the whitewash Carries you away from my Rough terrain
10.
Cowboy Song 04:35
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Roller coasters Race car driving down I-5 eating In-N-Out No more henna tattoos Bare ass on a sand dune Singing “Papa can you hear me?” Getting bagels Sunday mornings When he’s barely walking He’ll still be horseback riding In his Levi’s and his loafers When he’s barely talkin’ He’ll still be flippin’ you off He’ll be whistling with his fingers Hittin’ on all the waiters He’ll still be working ’Til the gears in his head stop turning Even when he’s on his last leg He’ll still be making a profit No more road trips No more Bonnie and Clyde No more roadside wildflowers Now I’m counting every hour
11.
Watching the Architects (Bonus Track) 02:59
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Lying awake on the pull out couch In the basement of my grandmas house Charlie Parker echoes down the staircase I rarely saw you smile She was 21 in the fine arts quad Watching the architects across the yard There you were writing in your notebook Laughter filled the air What does it mean to give everything When your life has just begun? “I knew that he’d be good to me” She said as I sat listening I was 17 with a lot to say But I didn’t have the words that day To say goodbye before the call was over Just static in the air What does it mean to say anything When your life has just begun What does it mean to give everything When your only 21 “I knew that he’d be good to me” She said as I sat listening I knew that she meant everything She said as I sat listening
12.
Oliver (I’m Dirty Dan Reprise) 02:23
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released February 27, 2024

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Bella Porter Los Angeles, California

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